Hypocrisy and the Church

Take the case of a sour old maid, who is a Christian, but cantankerous.  On the other hand, take some pleasant and popular fellow, but who has never been to Church.  Who knows how much more cantankerous the old maid might be if she were not a Christian, and how much more likable the nice fellow might be if he were a Christian?  You can't judge Christianity simply by comparing the product in these two people; you would need to know what kind of raw material Christ was working on in both cases.

C.S. Lewis, God in the Dock.

This week I had the privilege of talking to a man who is either a new Christian or is someone who for the first time in his life has understood the implications of the gospel.  He was sharing how God is changing him from an angry man into someone much more patient and kind.  Yet, he was concerned because he "still had his moments."  He also was worried because he so often did a good deed merely because of his concern for how it made him look.

After our time together, I was thinking of this quote from C.S. Lewis.  I am glad I was able to find it!  I think this man's concerns are natural questions.  They should be questions all believers have and wrestle with often.  Why?  Each of us is such a messed up mix of redeemed "saint" and fallen, sinful child of Adam.  How do we understand and balance these two competing tendencies?  

Let me begin by looking at the life and actions of a typical believer like you or me.  How do we understand our actions in light of the gospel?  Is it not true that there are so many moving parts and factors that shape how each of us respond to any given circumstance. 

I know I respond to difficulties in life and even the small inconveniences so differently when I am sick or really tired than when I am healthy and have had a good night's sleep.  If someone sees me respond on a bad day they might see something different than my actions on a good day.  Should I despair of this known fact?  Should I deny it is true?

Furthermore, I became a believer at age 18.  There were some really rough spots within my formed character when I became a believer.  God was and is so merciful to me, but I am still surprised by the thoughts that flow out of my heart and often pass through my mouth.  Why does the Lord not just zap me and change my heart so I think and say "darn" instead of "damn" when I do something wrong?  I honestly do not think about such words and thoughts, they just come out.  

How about you?  In what areas do you struggle?  How are you often surprised and humiliated by the evil that still dwells within?

Now let me give you the other side of God's story in my life.  The man I spoke with shared that I "said exactly the right thing the first time we talked.  If you said more or less, it might have ruined it."  How did I do that?  I also find that increasingly I just do the right thing without thinking about it.  I show love and grace to people without having to think about what would be loving or gracious.  Most importantly, I am a much better listener than I used to be even as I realize I still need so much improvement.  I find that I am always looking for what God is doing in the hearts and lives of others.

I must confess that none of these occurrences are natural to me.  I praise God that it is His work!  Still, I am haunted by my shortcomings.  I am humiliated by what often flows out of my heart.

Like the cantankerous, sour old maid, I am in need of grace!  I must wonder, what would I be like if Christ did not bring me to Himself all those years ago?  I know that the raw material God had to work with was greatly defaced and misshaped by sin and death before I even came to Jesus.  Those tendencies remain even today!  Yes I am still a sinner.  If you catch me on a bad day, I am sure I do not look like a saint.  In fact, if you are looking for hypocrisy and defining it as not always doing right, I am a hypocrite.

According to the definition of hypocrite as one who always does right, there is only one truly righteous person ever born, Jesus Christ.  I am a mere fallen follower of this great man!  I do not have it all together and I look to Him for grace and forgiveness daily.  

So, if you catch me in some sin, I hope I will be willing to confess my sin and need for this grace.  When I am disappointed and humiliated by my sinful heart, I look to Jesus as my only hope.  

Let me assure you, such thoughts are not natural to me!  My natural inclination is to deny my sin or to try to pass it off as less than what it is.  My natural inclination is to maintain my reputation instead of confessing my need.

For those of us who are not Jesus, I would define hypocrisy differently than always doing right.  I think true hypocrisy is not confessing and living the truth that I am a sinner in desperate need of grace.  Hypocrisy is not merely doing wrong when I should know better.  At times, all of us fail to do the good we know we should do!  No, hypocrisy is knowing I have such wrong tendencies (what the bible calls sin) that flow out of my heart and yet I do not address or confess them.

Are you living in active repentance and dependent faith?  Does confession and repentance come easy to you?  Can you see where you need grace and do you ask God for grace to transform these areas?

If the answers to these three questions are all yes, I think God is doing a great work in your life.  Cling to Christ and grow in grace!  Always point yourself and others to Jesus.

If your answers are no to any of these three questions, you are most likely a self-deluded hypocrite (wow that sounds harsh!  Please know I have lived much of my life in this state.).  Repent and believe.  Ask for grace to see your need.  Cling to Jesus as your only hope.

Growth comes as we reorient our life around Jesus Christ.  Such reorientation is a life-long process.  It is hard work because it goes against our fallen natural tendencies.  May each of us repent and believe in deeper ways this day and this week!

The Pure Church Fallacy

This Sunday will be my last week as the regular pastor at Grace Bible Church.  I have so enjoyed the time here and the people.  The Lord has used it all for my good, and I pray I have been good for the Church.  Yet, as I prepare my farewell remarks and final sermon, I am struck by how some have not been touched deeply by the gospel during my tenure at Grace.  At least I cannot see how their heart transformation has worked out into godly, dependent gospel-centered living.

Now I will confess that I do not have eyes to see all that God is doing.  I could be very wrong about how the gospel has touched people.  Yet, as I prepare to leave I am haunted by the thought that some have heard the gospel preached and witnessed it lived for eight years without it denting their heart.  I know it is more than possible.  I know every church has folks like this.  In fact, every church has members, even long-standing members, who are like this.  How is this possible?

Furthermore, what guarantees are there that after I leave there will not be division within the body at Grace because of the hard hearts of some within the congregation?  If a person is resistant to the gospel, will they try to draw the church away from holding firm to it?  Will folks "just be nice" to such people to the ruin of all?

I know my thoughts are rather dark this morning.  I apologize for being such a downer!  Yet, I do wonder how we can guard the church from division and evil.

An entire branch of Christianity states that the way to do so is to "make sure" everyone who joins is a believer.  While I do not disagree with the sentiment, I do wonder how we can "make sure" someone is authentically transformed by faith.  In my experience, people can say the right things, act the right way, and still turn out to be a great cause of division.  Their later actions illustrate that they were working evil and not the fruit of the spirit (Matt. 7:20; Luke 3:8-9; Jude 12).  At times their action even illustrate that they were not redeemed, but like the evil one himself, "masquerading as an angel of light." (2 Cor. 11:14)

So what does this mean?  Several distinctions are in order.  First, I believe in the absolute purity of the universal, invisible, true Church!  All of those authentically called, justified, and adopted by Jesus, throughout all of time and space, are part of this true family of God.  These folks are the true body of Christ in the world.  

The problem is that until heaven we will not be united together.  At this time, we live in a fallen world composed of many local churches.  These local congregations are the expressions of the Church universal, but they are mixed bodies full of the redeemed and those not yet or not ever redeemed.  We do the best we can in encouraging to membership those who truly believe in Jesus; but because the leadership and the individuals are fallen, sometimes an unredeemed person comes into membership.  In fact, all to often these unredeemed folks become leaders within the local congregation!

Let me give an example to illustrate my point.  In Acts 20:28-30, Paul is speaking his farewell to the Ephesian Elders.  He is giving his final encouragement and instruction.  He states, 

"Be on guard for yourselves and for all the flock, 

among which the Holy Spirit has made you overseers, 

to shepherd the Church of God which He purchased with His own blood.  

I know that after my departure savage wolves will come in among you, 

not sparing the flock;

and from among your own selves men will arise, speaking perverse things, 

to draw away the disciples after them."

What does this mean?  The Ephesian church leaders had among themselves those who would lead the church astray.  How is this possible?  Did not Paul train them and help install them?  Yes.  Did they not later in the chapter kneel down and pray with Paul?  Yes they did.  "By their fruits you will recognize them." Matt 7:20.  What matters is how you run the race and how you finish.

The Christian life is meant to be a life marked by dependent faith in Christ.  It is marked by authentic humility expressed in repentance and faith.  Have you noticed how leadership often is not marked by these traits?  In particular, leadership that goes wrong is not marked by these traits!

Living in a fallen world means that we must always be on guard against the schemes of the evil one.  He is a liar, a murderer (the root of all anger, jealousy, lack of love), and a pretender to authentic grace.  His schemes include placing false assurance into the hearts of some in hope that they will later wreck the mission and testimony of the church through their pride.

Again I ask, what does this mean?  Should we not join a church since it might be a mixed crew?  No!  It is important to join a church.  

Joining the church means willingly submitting to the order and authority of the local church.  It does not mean that you will agree with every decision made by the church, but that you will work to maintain the peace and purity of the church through healthy discussion, quick repentance when you wrong someone, and quick forgiveness when wronged.  It means that you willingly allow the Elders to speak the gospel into your life.  Most importantly, it also means that you are willingly ingrafted into the a local expression of the body of Christ.  It was an assumed condition for the Jews of Jesus' time.  It is important!

Yet, we should not be surprised or shocked when the behavior of others turns ugly.  We live in a fallen world!  We should not allow ugly behavior to continue in the name of being nice.  If we do so, we are encouraging and allowing evil.  We should lovingly confront and encourage repentance and faith.  Often the response will be repentance.  It might take time, but it will be so.  

Other times the response will be a striking out at you for mentioning their sin.  Does this surprise you?  Remember we live in a fallen world.  By their fruits you will recognize them.  One who refuses to repent from obvious sin should be treated as an unbeliever.  In other words, they need to hear the gospel.  Repentance, faith, trust in Christ, confession of sin, and walking in grace and truth should be lovingly proclaimed and announced.

Again, more can be said and probably should be said.  This post is getting long, so I will stop for today.  Comments and discussion are always welcome!

Is the Gospel enough?

The remedy for our sin, whether scandalous or acceptable, is the gospel in its widest scope.  The gospel is actually a message: here I am using the word gospel as a shorthand expression for the entire work of Christ in His historic life, death, and resurrection for us, and His present work in us through the Holy Spirit.  When I say the gospel in its widest scope, I am referring to the fact that Christ, in His work for us and in us, saves us not only from the penalty of sin, but also from its dominion or reigning power in our lives.  This twofold aspect of Christ's great work is beautifully captured in Augustus Toplady's great hymn "Rock of Ages," with the words,

Let the water and the blood,

From thy riven side which flowed,

Be of sin the double cure,

Cleanse me from its guilt and power.

Jerry Bridges, Respectable Sins, 33.

What a wonderful summary of the Gospel's content and action.  Bridges has been writing on this theme for almost thirty years.  In Respectable Sins, he is dealing with those sins that we as Christians often live with as acceptable and normal.  What sins might these be?  He argues that they are the modern expressions of those sins mentioned in scripture such as anxiety and frustration, discontent, unthankfulness, impatience and irritability, judgmentalism, and a lack of self-control.  I have not finished the book, but it has been good so far!

What particularly strikes me today is how the gospel is Christ-centered and Christ-focused.  The gospel is secure and powerful because Christ's work was finished and perfected with His resurrection.  There is absolutely nothing we can do to add to His finished work!  

Yet, how many of us live our Christian life as if His finished work is not enough?  In our mind, we affirm He is the answer, but in our real life, we labor to fix ourselves and our circumstances.  Somehow we have not learned how to appropriate His finished work into our life.

I know some will argue that our labor to fix ourselves and our circumstances flows from "His present work in us through the Holy Spirit."  If we are walking in active repentance and faith, I would agree.  If we constantly remind ourselves of Christ's finished work and claim it as our own, I completely agree.  I just wonder how many of us really live in such dependence?  Why is it so hard to find someone whose life is so marked by such a lifestyle and its resulting grace?

I know all too often my life is marked more by worry and anxiety than repentance, rest, quietness and trust (Isaiah 30:15).  How can I tell?  My inner dialogue runs through my concerns, questions, fears, and doubts more than it turns to constant reflection upon the beauty and grace of Christ.  The irony is that people often tell me that I am marked less with worry and anxiety than most!  Am I just good at hiding it or is this an epidemic among modern folks?

As I begin a new week after a glorious holiday weekend, I know what I must do.  Even with the busyness of packing and preparing to move, even with my fear and concern that no one has purchased my home, even with my constant wondering about the health of my coming child, I must repent and believe the gospel.  My worry and concern will not change a thing.  Yet, I know the One who can change all things.  I know the One who loves me and who is working for my good.  I know the source of all power and might.

Lord Jesus, have mercy on me a sinner.  Have mercy on us a people who are often marked more by unbelief than by repentance and rest!

For thus said the Lord God, the Holy One of Israel,

"In repentance and rest you shall be saved;

in quietness and in trust shall be your strength."

Isaiah 30:15

Freedom, Memorial Day, and the Gospel

"It was for freedom that Christ set us free; 

therefore keep standing firm and do not be subject again to a yoke of slavery." 

Gal. 5:1

Memorial Day in America is a time to remember.  We remember the men and women who sacrificed their lives so that we can have freedom here in America.  At least that it what it is supposed to be about!  I do fear that for most Americans, Memorial Day is just the three day weekend that kicks off summer.  Many of us do not take the time to think about the cost of freedom.  I guess if you are not directly impacted through the loss of a loved one, the cost of freedom is taken for granted.

Unfortunately, I think the same condition applies to many as they live the Christian life.  Christ died to set us free.  Yet for many of us, we are "not directly impacted" by this work.  Some have not experienced the life-changing grace of the Lord that brings new birth.  Others experienced it years ago, but now "live lives of quiet desperation" with little thought of applying Christ's death to today.  For many of us, Christ's death, like that of our soldiers, is a quickly passing thought before the real life of planting gardens, planning barbecues, or playing in our favorite recreational activity.

A gospel- and grace-centered life begins with constant reflection upon the gospel.  As we taste and see the beauty of Christ's love and mercy to us, we are transformed.  We reject the idols that held us fast as false, shallow, and unsatisfying.  Instead, we embrace the love, care, and presence of Christ, by and through the power the Holy Spirit that dwells within us, so that we regain a renewed and growing relationship with the Father.

Such reflection is impossible unless we realize how much we need renewed and growing relationship with God.  Without knowing our need, we will never fully trust in the cure.  Thus, the law of God is important because it battles our pride that leads to self-righteousness, and it casts us before Christ alone for mercy and grace.  As we repent of our self-effort and our other sins, we find joy, grace, and power to live a life of freedom.

Some people say this message is too negative.  I have heard it said often that the message of the gospel is not encouraging since it focuses too much upon our sin and need of God.  I am always amazed at this objection.  It is so short-sighted!  

In reality, ignoring the real gospel message means we replace it with something false.  Instead of learning to rest in the solid rock that is Christ, we prefer to trust in ourself.  Consequently, we give up our freedom and joy found in Christ for bondage found in trying to keep ourself satisfied while maintaing our undeserved reputation.  

In scriptural language, we reject the spring of living water for broken cisterns that cannot hold water (Jer. 2:13).  Is it negative to speak the truth?  Each of us need God's love and mercy daily!  We so quickly give up our freedom in Christ for bondage to self.  Confess, repent, and believe.

In the same way, our freedom here in America came by God's blessing, but it also came through the blood and service of those in our military.  America is a social experiment in personal liberty and freedom being granted to each individual.  This liberty gave each person the freedom and encouragement to pursue their own good, as well as the responsibility of working toward that end.  The result has been the greatest civilization the world has ever known (though the Chinese and other civilizations would disagree!).  

It is amazing how we as Americans take this for granted.  We give up our freedom for "peace" and "security."  At least that these are the code words we use.  What we really want instead of freedom is comfort and ease.  Friends all of these words are not synonyms for the same concepts!  Freedom always comes with a price, and it is maintained by diligence.  

As Americans, I fear we have become too self-absorbed to keep up the fight for liberty, opportunity, and freedom.  We give lip service to freedom, but we prefer bondage with "security" to freedom with responsibility.

Truly the fallen human condition forgets the blood that set it free!  As individuals and as nations we constantly drift toward comfort and security from society instead of finding our rest in Christ alone.  May the price paid by Christ be the center of our reflections this Memorial Day.

Growing through Suffering

"I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing 

with the glory that will be revealed in us." 

Romans 8: 18

Suffering.  Even as I mention it, I recoil.  It is not a subject I enjoy thinking about.  I enjoy going through it even less.  Often it seems like all I can do is endure.  In the painful grip of suffering, I don't even learn that much.  It takes time and reflection to learn, and in the midst of intense suffering I often lack the strength for reflection.

Perhaps this is why many Christians avoid the subject of suffering.  Entire breeds of Christians have banished all talk of suffering under the guise of spirituality by claiming Christ suffered for us so we do not have to suffer.  Like strange Christian Scientists, they have denied a foundational reality of living in a fallen world.

You want proof past your own experience?  Take a look at Paul.  I think he was a "spiritual" fellow.  Yet,  he had to endure beatings, imprisonment, rejection, and other sufferings for the lost and for the Church.  Still, he penned the words that began this post.  In the verse immediately proceeding this one, he mentioned that "we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory."

Paul is trying to tell us that suffering is part of our fallen world.  It serves the purpose of helping us grow  into deeper dependence and identity in Christ.

So what does this mean for us?  In the midst of broken relationships that cause so much pain, in the midst of the death or impending death of those we love, in the midst of unexpected illness, in the midst of our bad decisions, in the midst of living with the consequences of the bad decisions of others, how should we deal with suffering?

First, admit to God, yourself, and others that you are suffering.  Understand that we live in a fallen world marked by suffering.  All of creation "groans as in the pains of child birth" and is subject to "frustration" by the effects of sin.  Your experience is not abnormal and the suffering God, Jesus Christ, can identify with you.

Furthermore, suffering is often caused by our sin, the sin of others, or the effects of living in a sinful world.  In the midst of suffering, call sin, sin.  In yourself, in others, and in events confess what is not as it should be.  Confess what is not according to its created good.  Do not be afraid to confront the reality of sin and its effects.

What about suffering from seemingly random events like illness or death?  Remember we were made for something better.  We were not created to experience the pain of separation caused by ill health and death.  Cry out to God about the real pain caused by such illness or separation.  Ask Him to restore and redeem what the consequences of sin have brought about.  Remember there is more to life than just this life!  Jesus suffered, died and was resurrected to destroy the ultimate power of sin and death.  In Christ, there will be restoration to all that is lost.

Second, remember the gospel.  We have a taste of redemption, adoption, and freedom now in Christ.  One day, He will set all things aright, and we will know in full a restored relationship with God, others, ourselves, and creation.  If you have not believed, repent and accept His love!  Then, hope in the ultimate reality that you belong to Christ.  This life is fleeting.  Eternity is forever.  Pray for grace to "wait patiently" for our final hope.

Third, pray.  This is how the gospel gets applied to our life.  Take time to be before God and ask the Spirit to lead you to pray for what is really needed (8:26-27).  Pray for healing of your soul.  Pray for restoration of broken relationships.  Pray in confession of your sin and the sins of others.  Pray about the pain of illness and death.

Whatever the cause of the suffering, take time to pray about it.  Talk honestly and openly with the Living God.  He knows our pain and even our anger anyway!  We were made to live a life of faith.  Prayer is the avenue into an active faith.

May the Lord use our sufferings to bring about our growth in grace, truth, and love.

Calling and Conceit

With my impending move and all the small details I must manage in the next couple of weeks, my mind is very scattered.  I feel like I am driving down a beautiful, winding country road in a great car about 85 mph.  It is a rush, I am staying on the road because the car is fantastic, but I do not have energy and focus to spare on anything but driving.  

It seems that my days quickly pass into weeks, and soon my family will be moving 3300 miles away.  It is bittersweet.  Yet, it is my reality!  In the meantime, I will try to keep up with the writing.  To help me gain some focus, I will be bringing quotations and thoughts from others.  It is so much easier to comment than to be original!

Yesterday's theme was pastoral ministry.  Today's will be a return to the important topic of calling.  In particular, I wish to comment on how calling can become sinful pride.  To help get into the topic, I will quote from Os Guinness' book, The Call.  I do recommend this book!

The reverse side of calling is the temptation to conceit.  It's an illusion to think that recovering doctrines is simple and straightforward, that they need only to be reaffirmed to be rediscovered.  Far from it.  All truth in a fallen world is vulnerable to distortion.  In fact, each truth has its own foreseeable distortions that are its shadow side.  Each also has a sort of magnetic attraction to distortions prevalent in the people who believe the truth and the times in which they live.  ...

The closeness between calling and conceit is easy to see.  After all, to be called is to hear God whisper three things to you in a hundred intimate ways- "You are chosen; you are gifted; you are special."  Let those three things sink in for longer than the first precious moments and you will inevitably hear another voice, honeyed and smooth: "Yes, you really are chosen ... gifted ... special."

All too soon, if you are anything like most of us, you will find yourself saying in response to the devil's echo of God- to yourself, of course, never out loud: I'm chosen.  I'm gifted.  I really must be special.  And before you know it, the wonder of calling has grown into the horror of conceit.

Os Guinness, The Call, 118.

I believe this observation is so true!  Particularly if one is very gifted, creative, and talented.  Many will praise your ability and accomplishments.  After awhile, you begin to believe the "press clippings."  You know you can achieve and perform better than others, so you gain a sense of conceit and judgement upon those with less ability.  You also begin to take it for granted that you will always be able to perform!

I know in ministry such conceit is particularly true.  In the paid ministry ranks, virtually no one chooses such a career because they are not talented.  If you have no promise and talent, you will not get recommendations, you will not find a position, and you will not be able to do the duties of the job.  Yes, we all have different abilities and gifts, but we must use these gifts in a satisfactory manner at our particular call or we will soon find ourselves without a job!

As with every career and calling, some folks in ministry are particularly chosen, gifted, and special.  These folks can move people with words and deeds.  They see potential and they have the gifting to make that potential reality.  Such individuals will impact many lives.  They also are particularly prone to their calling becoming their conceit.

I remember clearly an internationally known pastor coming to Maine to share what he had learned about church growth and church revitalization.  I was so looking forward to hearing from him.  About half way through the talk, he shared that his research indicated that a church cannot really function like a church until it reaches 350 or 400 people in attendance.  Really?  In the city in which I live, there are only three or four churches that might claim that many in attendance.  In truth, I think there are only two!  Why would he say such a thing?

For this famous pastor, anyone slightly gifted should be able to quickly grow a church to that size.  In my humble opinion, this is not true in New England!  What was ironic was his attitude when confronted with this reality.  I think he was quite shocked.  I wonder if he believed if NE lacked talented pastors?

What happens for those in ministry is we take for granted our calling, gifting, and specialness given to us by God.  Does this not happen in every area of labor?  Of course it does.  I just know ministry the best since it is my particular calling.  As Guinness states, "All truth in a fallen world is vulnerable to distortion.  In fact, each truth has its own foreseeable distortions that are its shadow side."  

Before long, the pastor who constantly prayed for God's mercy and grace with fear and concern for the impending failure of their ministry calling, soon begins to trust their own gifting and talent to teach, preach, and lead.  God becomes the message of their success and He is no longer the method and power source for ministry.  

I fear many individuals and churches operate by trusting their own gifting and their pattern of past success instead of walking in fearful dependence upon Jesus and the power of the Holy Spirit in ministry.  What happened?  Their calling, including the fact that God chose, gifted, and blessed them, has become their conceit.  Surely pride has ruined many a person, many churches, and even entire denominations!

So what can be done?  Preach the gospel to yourself!  God is the great one, not me.  I am only chosen, gifted, and special because He declared it.  May these true "press clippings" be our meditation and guide!  Walk in humble repentance and faith no matter how gifted and talented you might be!  

May the Lord have mercy upon us so our calling does not become our conceit.

Transference: A Great Ministry Danger

I have been saving this post for quite some time.  In fact, I first ran across it on vacation, and I have been pondering it ever since.  In my pastoral ministry, and even as a professor, I have seen this psychological state several time.  Each time it scared me.  Why?  Because it is so unhealthy for all involved.  I know most pastors or those in ministry who make it 20 years have seen this happen multiple times.  Yet, so few in the pew seem aware this condition exists.  

What am I talking about?  The problem of transference.  In our fallen world, people often latch on to an authority figure and transfer their feeling about another relationship onto the one in authority.  Such transference is not conscience.  Yet, it is all too real.  Let me explain it by quoting at length a section of David Hansen's The Art of Pastoring.

I'm gun-shy of people who like me too much.  I like compliments, but when someone starts treating me like I'm the best thing since indoor plumbing, I step back.

They get this look in their eyes when they say thank you.  It isn't adult gratitude or childlike delight.  It isn't a fair exchange of human love.  They're thanking me, but their eyes are focused past me.  They're thanking someone or something else.  Maybe an ideal I've resurrected.  It's unreal.

The relationship can appear normal.  Then, without warning, it shifts.  Their talk gets contradictory.  They thank Jesus but give me the credit.  Their speech is thick with spiritual lingo, but they treat me like I'm their savior.  I don't think they're talking about me or Jesus.  They're talking to someone or something I symbolize to them.  Psychologists call this transference.

Psychotherapists recognize that their relationship with patients run on a "double track."  "All feelings in relationships as we know understand them run on a double track.  We react and relate to another person not only on the basis of our conscious experience of the person in reality, but also on the basis of our unconscious experience of him in reference to experience with significant people in infancy and childhood- especially parents and other family members.  We tend to displace feelings and attitudes from these past figures onto people in the present, especially if the person in the present has features similar to the person in the past."

Pastors like therapists, evoke feelings in people that go way back into people's pasts.  "Feelings toward the therapist therefore stem not only from the real, factual aspects of the therapist-patient interaction, but also from feelings displaced onto the therapist from unconscious representations of people important to the patient early in his childhood experiences.  These displaced or transferred feelings tend to distort the therapist, making him appear to be an important figure in the patient's past; they create in one sense an illusion." ...

It is of no little consequence that in some traditions pastors are called "Father."  We are authority figures with love, so like it or not, we symbolize parents to people.  For adults who have had positive relationships with their parents, this creates little problem.  They have respect and love for their parents.  Likewise, they have a natural respect and love for pastors.

But in cases where the relationship with the parent was deeply faulted, people develop something like an ideal parental construct and transfer this to anyone like a parent- and especially someone who gives them love as their parent should have in the first place.  Parishioners can superimpose this ideal parental figure over the pastor; they "fall in love"- not with the pastor, but with the pastor as the incarnation of their ideal parental figure.  Then they shift the monumentally important childhood desire to please their parent, which was never satisfied by their natural parents, onto the pastor.

The compliments come fast and thick, and they express a strong and unreasonable desire to "help out any way they can."  They try to work harder than anyone else- and make sure the pastor knows it- to earn the pastor's love.  They want the pastor to appreciate them more than all others.

Parishioners caught in this unconscious process may undergo "conversion" experiences.  They may experience romantic changes and testify that they have been touched by God (never forgetting to add that it was through the pastor's ministry).  In psychotherapy this is called a "transference cure."  They do experience dramatic change, but it is motivated by the desire to please the pastor.  The results of these "conversions" diminish with time, especially once the period of intense positive feelings toward the pastor wanes.

And those feelings do disappear.  Alongside the deep reservoir of childhood desire to please the parents there exists a deep reservoir of anger at parents for all the hurt they caused.  This anger has no fixed object.  It is anger at parents, but children are not psychologically able to be angry at their parents for long.  Children cannot divorce themselves from the parental love they desperately need by showing or even admitting that they are angry.  But they can cut loose on someone who represents their parent.

Things can do along for quite a while, even years.  These people are accustomed to forgiving parental figures, so pastors can fail them now and then and they will forgive.  In fact, they will vehemently defend their pastor to others, even when the pastor is dead wrong.

Until something snaps.  There is no way to predict what will set it off, but suddenly, without warning, the pastor violates some code.  The pastor must pay.  These people's anger at their parents is unleashed on the pastor.

The pastor still symbolizes the parent, but now the parent being symbolized has shifted.  The pastor is no longer the ideal parental figure the parishioner loves.  The pastor is now the failed parent the parishioner hates.  Without warning, the pastor who yesterday represented all that was right in the world today represents all that is wrong in the world.  From Jesus to the devil in one hour.

Hansen, The Art of Pastoring, 124-127.

I told you it was a long quotation!  I think it is also an important point: in a fallen world, all is not as it appears or should be.  Even the most basic of relationship can become twisted and contorted.  We must be aware of this potential or we run the risk of ramming our life and ministry upon the shoals of brokenness and being ruined in the process!

Because of transference, most pastors, particularly ones who survive in ministry, are rather guarded about people who like them too much.  How do we judge "too much?"  There is no easy answer.  It is a weird feeling that something is wrong.  Often after being burned by the switch turning to "counter-transference" the pastor or leader is a bit gun-shy of people bringing too much praise.  Through time and experience, one begins to recognize that "look in the eye" of a broken person.

If you have been in ministry and you have been hurt by this process, please realize it was caused by brokenness and it is not all your fault!  I know the first time I experienced transference, I thought it was great.  I had made a friend and someone who truly appreciated by effort!  Then, when I experienced that "something snapped" moment, I wondered what I did wrong.  I really beat myself up over it!  You might react the same way.

If you do experience transference, I strongly recommend that you find an experienced pastor or leader to talk it over with.  It is likely they will share similar experiences.  Most importantly, learn from it!  A wise leader does everything possible to avoid the same mistakes.  Love but do not be anyone's savior.  Only Jesus can fulfill that job!

So, what do you think?  Do you struggle in your relationship with "authority figures" because you engage in transference?  Ask the Lord to give you some wisdom with this.  Find someone to talk to if this is your tendency because relationship wreckage will mark your life if you do not!

Transference is real.  It is a consequence of living and ministering in a broken world.  May the Lord give wisdom and grace to live through it, grow past it, and see true healing for those suffering with its consequences.

Trash, Grace, and God's Steadfast Love

The Steadfast love of the Lord never ceases,

his mercies never come to an end;

they are new every morning;

great is your faithfulness.

Lamentations 3: 22-23

Today is one of the high points of my week.  It is trash day!  I love the feeling of gathering all my trash for the week, putting it into containers, and taking it to the curb.  I know it sounds crazy, but I do love it!

Why do I like trash day so much?  I love getting rid of all the mess, all the excess, all the left-overs, and all that I need to get rid of.  To me it feels cleansing.  It is a regular symbolic cleansing of my garage of all the messy, stinky leftovers from a busy week.  Trash day gives me a renewal on life!

I am sure to some this sounds crazy.  Even as I share my joy in trash day, I wonder how some will understand it.  Let me try to explain why I get such joy.  To do so I will use what could be taken as a sexist description I heard from a marriage seminar somewhere.  Please give me the grace to hang with me until I explain.

I have heard it said that men are like filing cabinets and women are like white boards.  What is meant by this is that men can deal with an issue or problem.  When we are done, we file it away and it does not bother us any more.  We open the next file and put the stress of the last one behind us.  

Meanwhile, women are like a white board with all the issues and problem visible.  A woman may focus on one issue, but all are present so as the white board fills up so does their stress level.  Furthermore, when a problem is continuing or weekly it becomes an issue that never gets erased.  It becomes a never ending burden.

I must admit that I have met men who are like whiteboards and women who are like filing cabinets.   Yet, I think there is at least a measure of truth in the general personality description given in the marriage seminar.  At least it works in my household!  Also notice that it means that women are much better multi-taskers while men can compartmentalize so much that they miss important details.  This is another trait of my household!

So with the image of trash day and filing cabinets in place, let me explain today's joy.  For me, trash day is representative of all the junk in my life.  Over the course of a day or a week, I have many different problems, issues, and stresses in which I must process.  What I try to do is deal with the issue and move on.  I also try to put the stress into one file and put it away.  

The problem is that sometimes the stress file just stays open on my desk!  How do I deal with it?  I must ask for God's help.  There have been times in my life when my stress file was so big that I cannot close it or even take it over to the filing cabinet!  Thankfully, after while, I cried out to God for mercy and He helped me.

I have learned that it is best never to allow the junk of life to build up.  As I age, I also call upon the Lord quicker.  Every Monday is trash day.  As I take out the trash, I think of all the junk from the past week: the bad decisions, the hurtful words, the financial questions, the illnesses, and all the rest.  I take the garbage to the end of the drive, and I ask God to take the trash out of my life.  The sight of the empty cans confirms the Lord's promises!

Today's passage affirms that I do not need to wait until Monday to do this.  The mercies of the Lord are new every morning.  As I come into His presence, I hold fast to this promise!  I confess my needs.   I confess my mistakes.  I ask for cleansing.  I receive His mercy and His aid in putting the past behind me.

I encourage you to look for symbolic examples of the Father's love.  Find little reminders of His grace.  As fallen people, we so easily forget the love and mercy of the Lord!  Confess this tendencies and ask for grace to be reminded.  God loves us and He wants to help clear our whiteboards and empty our filing cabinets!

The Bible as our Surest Means of Grace Part 2

"Draw near to God, and He will draw near to you." 

James 4:8

"All scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, 

for reproof, for correction and for training in righteousness." 

2 Tim 3:16 

In yesterday's post, I presented a way of reading scripture and praying that I recommend for anyone who struggles with how to apply the bible to their every day life.  I aimed the post at new believers and not yet believers, but I also know many of us who have known Jesus for years struggle with the same issues.  

Please understand that I know it is easy to be confused and discouraged with anything new.  Learning how to read and apply the bible is not something that just comes naturally.  It is a new task or discipline that we must learn through focused practice.  I want to offer one means of gaining this focused practice!

Please also understand that there is much in the bible that can be confusing.  Here is some examples of basic but almost universal questions that arise when someone begins reading the bible.  Why does God kill all those people in the OT?  Why does Jesus make the Christian life so hard in the Sermon on the Mount?  Why are some books of the bible so hard to understand?  Rest assured that there are good solid answers to each question!  The key is to seek out the answers while learning how to walk with God in grace and mercy.  Do not give up as many do!

No matter what others may do, each of us are responsible and called to develop a relationship with the Living God.  Sometimes, I do wish others could do it for me.  I must also confess that sometimes I do not wish or desire such a relationship.  When I am tired, weary, or sick, I often find my desire for God is low. In fact, there have been seasons of life where I lacked an intensity for God's presence.  All of us will go through such times.  When this occurs, repent and ask the Holy Spirit to lead you into God's presence.  Remember that the promise of scripture still stands:  "Draw near to God, and He will draw near to you." James 4:8  The key is understanding how to draw near to the living God!

As I presented yesterday, this is where scripture and prayer draw us close to the Living God.  First and foremost, you might need to change the way you read the bible.  It is not a novel, but the active and living Word of God.  Read it reflectively, with an open heart and mind.  I also encourage you to read it while praying for wisdom and for God to give guidance (Pro 2:1-6 gives a good model).

In addition to the gospels, I also encourage folks to read in the Psalms and Proverbs.  The Psalms are located right in the middle of the modern bible.  These 150 Psalms are the OT prayer book.  They are model prayers, and they are great for focusing my thoughts and prayers toward God and toward gaining His perspective.  Prayerfully reading one or two a day will be plenty!  When you get to Psalm 119, it might even take three or four days!  (Ps. 119 has 176 verses!)

For over 20 years, I have also read a chapter in Proverbs each day.  There are 31 chapters, so one per day for a month works out great.  These Proverbs never grow old!  I find and have found much practical wisdom in their pithy statements of general truth.

Let me give an example of how to use the Proverbs to listen to God.  Several times in my life, as I read through Proverbs one verse at the end of chapter 21 has jumped off the page as I read it.  

"The horse is made ready for the day of battle, but the victory belongs to the Lord."

In prayer, I have asked the Lord, what does this mean?  I remember one time, the Lord poured such encouragement into my heart and life.  He affirmed that the difficulties I was going through was part of the "making ready for battle."  He encouraged me that ultimately He would give the victory.

Just this past December, the same verse gave me a different encouragement.  As I was reading the chapter, not too carefully I might add, again this verse jumped off the page.  I was reminded of the busyness of the fall season.  There have been many trips to complete, pages to write, sermons to prepare, and decisions to make.  Overall, I was not been stressed or overloaded.  I was thankful for each opportunity that the Lord presented.  I believe the Lord used me in building His kingdom as I interacted with many different folks.

So, what did I learn as the Lord brought this to mind?  First, He has prepared me, like a well-armored war horse for writing and the ministry.  I praise Him for this!  Yet, completion of writing and ministry always will be by His blessings, not my supposedly great preparation or abilities.  In fact, without His help, I can assure you nothing in ministry would succeed.  I cannot labor in such a way that I see lives ultimately changed.  My victory rests with the Lord.

I have learned this lesson many times, but I have to keep learning it.  I am forgetful.  I am drawn to repentance for the times I have walked in my strength instead of the Lord's.  I look to Jesus for mercy and grace.  I believe my victory and rest comes by walking with Him.  He gives me grace!  As it overflows, I am transformed so I can offer that grace to others.

Friends, our success in life or in coping with difficulties rests not in our strength- not even our "spiritual" strength and knowledge.  It rests in Jesus working in and through us, by His grace, to equip us, strengthen us, and empower us to be His witnesses in the world.  His power and grace comes as we repent of our self-effort and ask Him to work in and through us for His glory.

Second, I was challenged to remember that a grace-filled life must be a God-centered life.  It is not about me nor what I can do.  It is about the Lord and His grace working through a cracked and frail earthen pot!  May He receive the glory.

In encourage you to start the practice today of reflectively reading and praying through scripture!

"All scripture is breathed out by God and profitable 

for teaching, for reproof, for correction and for training in righteousness." 

2 Tim 3:16

Sometimes we just need a guide to help us start understanding how all of scripture fits together!  You mostly likely cannot go wrong if you read through the very practical OT wisdom literature and the gospels!

The Surest Means of Growing in Grace

"The horse is made ready for the day of battle, but the victory belongs to the Lord." 

Pro. 21: 31

Today I wish to speak of an important topic: how do we use the bible to grow in grace?  I know that the bible can be a confusing and huge book for those not familiar with its contents.  Many folks pick up the bible and starting reading in Genesis.  By the time they get to the middle of Exodus (if they make it that far), they are bored, confused, and ready to give up the whole book!  I do not blame them.  These OT stories without their redemptive content make little sense.

I have also met many who profess faith in Christ, but they have never been able to develop the habit nor taste for reading God's Word.  In fact, this is an epidemic among believers!  I encourage you to go further up and deep into your walk with God.  The bible is our surest and greatest means of grace.  Please do not neglect a proper use of scripture to help you grow in your knowledge and experience of God, to protect you from the schemes of the evil one, and to help you increase your wisdom for everyday living.

I suggest that a new believer, a not quite yet believer, and a believer who struggles to really understand the bible start somewhere other than Genesis when they begin to learn about the bible.  All of the scriptures are useful, but some of them require some background knowledge before their true message can be understood.  Do not let this discourage you!  Start by getting some of that background knowledge!

First and foremost, start reading in the gospels- Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John at the beginning of the NT.  In these books, an honest reader will encounter the person of Jesus.  Read a chapter.  Take your time and ask the Lord to give you wisdom as to what the message means.  The bible is not a novel to be finished, but a message from God to be listen to and transformed by.  Read and think of your life. Ask God for wisdom.

After reading in the gospels, I encourage folks to take some time to pray.  I remember the first time I engaged in this pattern.  I closed by eyes and began to tell God all about my concerns.  I prayed for everyone and everything I could think of.  When I finished, I had prayed for only 5 minutes.  I have heard stories of folks praying for hours.  How is this possible?!

I have since learned that prayer is not just me telling God about my concerns, but also learning how to listen.  At this point, scripture actively works to transform.  As I read the gospels, I ask God for wisdom.  When thoughts come to mind, I pray about them.  I ask for wisdom with people and situations.  I also find that ideas and thoughts come to mind from the scripture that help me get perspective.  Often this perspective concerns my heart and attitude!

Here is where the gospel informs my reading.  As I encounter Jesus, He often uses the Word of God to drive me to repentance.  I see my failings.  I repent of these failings, and I look to Him for mercy.  Praise be to God, He gives it!  This love poured out to me, which is the gospel promise, then allows me to see other differently.  It gives me new perspective.  It gives me love to give to others.

I also find that God will use the scriptures to encourage me as I have made good choices.  He uses His word to give me an insight before I encounter something unexpected in a day.  In other words, God's word is active in the life of those who seek Him and His wisdom.  Please seek Him and His wisdom!

This post is growing long, so I will offer some more encouragement and insight about the bible in tomorrow's post.  I will conclude by stating that God's word is life-changing.  I implore you to pick it up and read it reflectively.  It will change your life as you read it asking the Lord for wisdom.  As the writer of Hebrews states, 

"For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart." 

(Heb 4:12)

Calling and a Sense of Need

Almost 25 years ago I had a serious crisis of faith.  No, I did not come to doubt the existence of God!  I came to understand that what I believed and trusted in did not answer the real questions of life.  Looking back, I can see how God worked to bring about this crisis of faith.

So what happened?  As I ended my high school career, I found myself in an enviable position.  I had navigated the shoals of high school successfully: I had friends, respect, very good grades, and a bright future.  I had achieved the high goals I had set, and I was ready to move to a bigger pond to swim with the bigger fish!

Then I began to have a gnawing feeling of sorrow.  Why?  I had achieved my goals.  I knew I could set more and higher goals, work hard, and then I could continue to achieve.  But then what?  Fulfilling my goals and achieving "my dreams" really did not make me happy.  It made me proud, but not happy.

Furthermore, I also had some friends who were disappointed with their future prospects.  In their life, things were not working out.  They were looking for jobs, and they were not happy.  We would sit around and talk.  I found that the same fears, questions, and lack of happiness marked both those who were achievers and those who were struggling.  If that is the case, what's the point?

Here is where my crisis of faith occurred.  I had trusted in the Midwestern dream of hard work, achievement, and success.  I had won this race.  Yet, I was not happy or satisfied.  If I went to college and did the same, I seriously doubted that I would be happy and satisfied.  I would then move on to a career.  If I did the same, would I be fulfilled and satisfied?

What happened if I failed?  My friends were miserable, and I knew I would be miserable also with failure.  Is life meant to be tolerated instead of enjoyed?  There had to be more to life than this rat-race of attempted success.

At this point, I did something strange.  I picked up a bible and decided to see if it had some answers.  Why did I do this?  Looking back, I can see it was God's hand at work bringing me to faith.  He was calling me.  At first I could not understand the source of this call.  I also could not grasp its meaning.  Yet, as Augustine said, "My heart was restless until it found its rest in Thee."

I believe my experience is not singular.  I think it has occurred many times and in many places with many different people.  Until we find our rest in faith and trust in the Living God, we are restless.  I so appreciate Os Guinness's take on this phenomena.  As he states,

True seekers are looking for something.  They are people for whom life, or a part of life, has suddenly become a point of wonder, a question, a problem, or a crisis.  This happens so intensely that they are stirred to look for an answer beyond their present answers and to clarify their position in life.  However the need arises, and whatever it calls for, the sense of need consumes the searchers and launches them on their quest.

Notice that "a sense of need" does not justify people's believing.  People do not come to believe in the answers they seek because of need- that would be irrational and make the believer vulnerable to the accusation that faith is a crutch.  Rather, seekers disbelieve in what they believed in before because of new questions their previous beliefs could not answer.  The question of what and why they then come to believe is answered at a later stage.  As Malcolm Muggeridge's biographer wrote of the conversion of the great English journalist, "He knew what he disbelieved long before he knew what he believed."

Os Guinness, The Call, 11.

I think so much of life is similar to hearing the call of God to first faith.  When we feel an intense angst and growing discontent with our circumstances, with life, with everything, we should ask the question, "Lord what are You trying to tell me?"

This question is not only valid for pursuing first trust in the Lord.  Continuing to ask the Lord for clarification and guidance should be taught as a natural element of learning how to walk with God.  He uses our questions, discontent, illness, hardships, major positive steps in life like marriage or the birth of a child, job loss, job gain, and growing old as catalysts to propel us deeper into faith and trust.  

In what or whom do you trust?  Is it growing stale?  Does it no longer satisfy?  Please know that your feelings of discontent or wonder are natural.  They are actually brought about by our heart's need to find its rest in Christ alone.  Take some time to be still before the creator and lover of your soul so you can begin to hear with increasing clarity the call of God.